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Eyu. 08'07'92 WRPS;NYGH;HCI NUS Architecture Taint a celestial vault for me in shades of blue, and sprinkle stars over clear waters, emulating musical notes floating through frozen times. Give me a sandglass containing grains of memories, take a photo of someone dancing through the prairie fields, or maybe filter Paris's boulevards and cafes in vintage lens -- drown me in such ethereal worlds. ♪s recommends ♥KAGAYA ♥MND Minister Khaw Boon Wan the next route, family blogs ♥09A16 ♥ARES ♥ROU+EYU LUNWEN ♥102 '06 ♥202 '06 ♥NYCHOIR 202'06 ♥bearbear ♥guenn ♥minying ♥yihui 408'08 ♥evelyn ♥felicia ♥rouying ♥chiling seniors ♥ewe ♥her tumblr 09A16 <3 ♥jinyao 6w1 '04 <3 ♥yukiyoyeo (: ♥hweetian ♥cheryl ♥yen chuan
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Thursday, September 23, 2010 ( pensieve @ 8:55 PM )  prelims over and i find myself refreshening up by surfing tumblr, listening to soothing songs posted up by others (surprisingly not yiruma but maybe later ha ha that reminds me), quite on the contrary to what i've believed i would be doing, like watching youtube or pet society or even watching ppstream?this feeling of aging, and this feeling of cleansing the soul (Y) and i realise that i have shut myself out from msn for so long that now when i open it it lags my computer and so i have no choice but to close it down again. (Y) god's will? pieces of pensieve thoughts floating around in my mind. (and i cant type heart icons anymore, i dont know why) "i still want to be a teenager and do crazy things!" i dont know why but im already fearing of what's to come. tied together with the unsure future, and the tempo of the music quickening, "i am too young to feel this old" so many people are feeling the same thing too, and this is what tumblr assures you huh. i think, i'm getting a tumblr(: finally huh. translating these melancholies into words and pictures (this somehow reminds me of 锦瑟) i wonder how my Prelims went. this time it felt so empty and i dont even know my ways anymore. just hope everything would be better:O I think. I used symbolism in this post (ha ha). it's hard to imagine what happens next, and where to go from here. and the idea of fearing the years to come is itself a scary thing. because it reminds me of Tales From Earthsea when the fear of aging indicates the very fear of living, and if it was all to be true, this means, indefinitely, that i'm constantly refusing to live? i dont know anymore. but then again, how am i supposed to accept living when i dont even know my goals and such, maybe it just boils down to a simple love? love, to live for others. (Y) to Tales From Earthsea. did i just solve my problem? but it seems somewhat (very in fact) idealistic in this modernized and commercialized world of ours. ohmygod it's back to this. i hear the music tempo quickening again (no this time round, im really listening to the same music. but then again) and that faint sigh coming from beneath those heavy dreams that visit more and more often. i dont know i dont know i dont know. Everyone becomes alone someday living on only in memories. i just hope, by then i would similarly have the courage to face it, that impending judgement. the faith and courage and love to let yourself go, to accept living, to acknowledge that you have once lived meaningfully, and to have painted your white canvas in a vigorous rainbow ANGEL BEATS! (Y) (ha ha ha, to have ended this whole pensive post in a simple anime.suggests its deepness) |